Even as a young child I was butch (when I was allowed to choose my own clothing that is). And thinking back on my childhood Halloween costumes recently, I realized just how many of them were male characters: Superman, Lion-O from Thundercats, and for MANY MANY MANY years I was Dracula. Like, I just got obsessed with Dracula and repeated that custome over and over again. I was totally digging the cape and the fake teeth, and I imagine I knew that Dracula was supposed to be this smooth talking ladies man. I wanted that Dracula swagger, y’all. I wanted it bad.
Now keep in mind my trick or treating years ended in the early 90’s. I grew up in small town Alabama. My parents were and very much still are anti-gay. But ya know what? I don’t remember them ever once telling me I couldn’t be Superman or the male lead on Thundercats or the suave “I vant to suck your blood” Dracula. Maybe they tried to push traditional feminine costumes. I honestly don’t remember. But what I do remember is that for one night a year I got to dress in a way that felt more authentic to who I was and no one made me feel ashamed for that. AND I got a pumpkin head bucket full of candy. Living the dream y’all!
On a quick side note, I am not coming out as transgender. I’m aware that one sentence could lead to that conclusion. So I want to clear that up. I think today’s kids might call me gender queer. But I’m just Jen. I embrace my masculine side and I love my feminine side. And the way I express those is uniquely mine and what makes me…well…Me.
I hope everyone has a fun and safe Halloween and I hope you get to live out the fantasy (or reality) that your heart desires!
Trick or Treat, y’all!
~jen
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